Self Mastery

Perfection of the simple things creates space in our lives and transforms us into living masters of the dharma. Creating space by simplifying and then concentrating our focus like a kind laser beam on every activity throughout the day of our ordinary lives cultivates peace and welcomes purity. Perfection is created by repetition and nothing else. Imagine how you might be perfecting a bad habit and stop today. Instead perfect the simple things you do by seeing them as the path to liberation and enlightenment -because they are. Your mind and body must become one. The mind loves to leave what it considers boring or repetitive, abandoning the body to perform these actions, only half of your heart is in it. Your whole heart must be there. Emotions are fuel, we must be wise where we let our mind travel because it effects our feelings. Choosing the right thought becomes very important. We are not puppets to our mind.

So by doing the practice described yesterday, ordinary becomes super ordinary. This is the only way to know what is deep within the unconscious, slow down. Pay more attention to the language of your body. Your body is holding all the residue of past experience. You have enough to do right now, just with that. You need nothing more. If you listen and stop trying to complicate, glamorize or escape some other way. It’s normal, we all do it. But we need to stop.
You are not different then a great zen master living atop a mountain surrounded by sky and light. This world points to another place where holy people are, but the holy people must be us. In this normal working class neighborhood, with these limitations. It is my intention to prove what is possible for us all. In each and every situation,  we can create the hermitage, we can walk as the masters walk. Through the neighborhood, through the dirty city.
It’s easier the more clutter we can strip away. Clutter to the mind, heart and body. You know what and who you don’t need. You know what you need to do. First, don’t try. Do. Second don’t say- “I should” say- “I must.” Day by day, moment by moment, come back to the breath and empty your weary mind. These things don’t matter. The Buddha said, “If you want to end your problems, stop thinking.” It’s that easy and it’s going to take some discipline. A shaolin master said, “Self discipline leads to self responsibility, self responsibility leads to self care, self care leads to self love and self love leads to compassion.” Take this to heart. Think very highly of yourself and what you might be worth. Low self esteem is what keeps us down and then we over compensate with defense mechanisms that become so mechanical we don’t even know how we are sabotaging our potential anymore. This is why perfection of the simple things creates the space in our lives to unravel these patterns and transform us into living masters of the dharma.
Washing a dish, walking across a room, feeding the dog, lying still and staring at the ceiling, picking a flower, sweeping. These are huge poetic gestures. They are not meaningless activities. You are the entire universe circulating the light of divinity. Do not let your restless mind fool you that an irreversible mistake has been made. This is your bodhisattva training. You have everything and nothing is in your way. *Back to your body, back to your body, back to your body. Your sweet humble servant. The temple of your sacred heart. Do not abandon yourself there, hidden under your flesh all the answers wait. Feel yourself and don’t imagine that a spiritual person only should feel, happy….content…etc. At the same time, don’t act out either. Observe and experience with total self acceptance . Be honest and feel the tensions without judgement or fear. Let it all pass through you. The bardo is where we are now. Let us live with that victory in mind. How capable we actually are of traveling through this passage yet once again.  (*When the body relaxes and tension decreases simultaneously the buried traumas can rise to the surface to be released. This may cause further anxiety however as these tensions are making themselves known. This is a replica of being in the bardo, facing and feeling the demons that we ourselves have created due to the disowning of ourselves for whatever reason.)
Like I said, repetition creates perfection. Every act is a practice of yoga. Nothing and nobody is separate. Nothing and nobody is more or less important than another. Then because of this you know what to do. Clarify and represent as you have always felt you were born here in samsara to do. Show this world what is possible starting with you and your life wherever you find yourself in the mess of things. This is the truth. You can be the one who is missing from your life. You can be the love that everybody searches for. You can stop the suffering that leads to another dead end. You can be free from the imaginary past, the pain that time and space has caused. Because we pushed it down to survive, because we didn’t know better, because we weren’t paying attention. But now we are and we can just sit still and let the past catch up in our bodies. We can listen to the language that has no words. We can most definitely be free.
This is a poem written by a very wise and well known astrologer named Isabelle Hickey. In the poem she is personifying Saturn, the lord of karma, as being female. The feminine approach is the way of the Tao, also the idea behind Aikido. You use the weight of the opponent to overcome the battle. There is a riddle to this way, but once you get it, it’s yours.
Saturn, Angel of Discipline

“In the deep darkness of grief and pain I found the angel of light again. She wore no lovely garment of white, But was garbed in robes as deep as night. I saw in her arms no flower fair, Instead, a crucifix nestled there. She didn’t walk with joyous tread Or offer me relief from dread, But I felt her peace and her quiet power, And knew in that night of awe filled hour,  She was the angel of eternal dawn. Lifting her hood, I saw her face And knew the glory that hid her grace. From earth blinded eyes too dim to see That only through her, could we ever go free!”

Sharada Devi

You can do this

The best thing you can do is focus on the here and now by focusing on your breath. In and out and nothing else as it enters and leaves the nostrils. For at least an hour or two a day. This isn’t controlled breathing, just the natural breath however it is. Don’t think of Krishna, don’t think of anything. The mind will slow down eventually if you watch that you do not grasp at the thought but simply let it be. You can’t make it go. Do not entertain any thought.  When you find that you have, just return to the peace of your breath. The thought is only a cloud in the sky. Clouds pass in their own time. Do not let your mind leave your body. Your body is communicating, quietly in many ways. Pay attention to the subtle feelings there without reacting. If feelings rise, let them be there without needing to feed any story. Do not try to control anything -but that you stay totally still, non reactive and are observing the breath as it enters and exits the nostrils. When a feeling arises in the body focus your consciousness there as if it were a flashlight. When the feeling dissipates, go back to the breath. Your body holds the karma. The body is the place all the astral energy manifests. This is why certain spiritual practices are so powerful at transforming how we might experience some powerful karmic purging physically. The mind wants to leave but should not. The mind should slow down and root itself in the breath and subtle feelings that the body will reveal little by little as the mind relaxes. It is basic and the most powerful thing. It within your grasp to do this. Do not even say a mantra or a prayer. Do this and only this. At the beginning and end you can say a prayer or mantra but not during the practice described.

Yes, support is helpful and group energy is potent when everyone is moving in the same direction. I am working on this right now, what I can provide within my new circumstances. I don’t care about being popular, I care about being real. It’s the only relief that endures.

The emotional ups and downs and the mental craziness can just be used as fuel for the fire of tapas. Tapas is the sitting and watching of the breath. Tapas is the frictional space between now and when the mind’s wanderings, whims and seductions subside. That is purification. The deepest psychological problems are stored in the body. This is why you must do this, it’s is the yoga of a well lived human life. Supernatural things are possible. But the catch is, there is no way around it. No loophole or bypass. That’s it.
*You need exercise also. The least you can do is walk for an hour. Silently and consciously focused on your steps and your breath. This is not to replace the practice described above. It’s in addition to. The food you’re eating matters too, but that’s another subject. Keep in mind to stay balanced.
Be a Buddha. Sharada Devi

The next right thing

  1. It’s like climbing a mountain and sliding back down….maybe we can make it a little higher this time.
⭐️closer to the stars….
Where we have stored these visions and dreams.  They are real.
I see as time passes- how tired everyone becomes. The compromises and deals that get made. Like the devil did with Jesus. The devil felt like a friend not an enemy.
I know everyone is hungry and remotely desperate. This feeling is so normal it seems it becomes the natural state. This is not natural, this is the suffering of samsara.
We should not reminisce of the good old days in Mount Shasta and pine for Bhagavan Das. We should make more stars and climb again toward the heavens where we hide.
I’ll sing you a song about how perfectly a flower grows in your heart. And it’s not like the seed isn’t there or anyone needs something more. Everyone needs something less. To strip the lie and purify. This takes effort endurance courage and will.
Strength is acquired. Devotion is the only fuel the heart runs on. The heart is the seat of courage. The heart is the abode of compassion. It’s not for you that you aspire. It’s for everyone who feels the pain and loss exactly as you do. Devotion takes cultivation. Giving to that grace only feels like a sacrifice in a world full of lies. It is the only line we’ve been thrown. Do not give up. Do not let anything stop the rising flame.
 You know we all must become the perfect student and servant before we can be the perfect teacher and master. It is two sides of the same coin.
Do not be convinced it’s ok to lay at the bottom looking up and daydreaming of the past or a life yet to come. Get up and do the next right thing.
Sharada Devi

Self Deception and Human Art

I have a creative talent for seeing what a person could be as if that person were something I was sculpting. (I include myself in this claim and all inner work- I aspire artistically very high for us all.) Because I am an artist at heart with a spiritually centered background. I am looking for divinity everywhere and I am looking to create the most beautiful vessel- whether in a human, a room or on a page-   We are here as potential.  People have come to me and when I saw what could be I pointed out what was in the way only when they asked.  Nobody really wants to know even then-  and most don’t even ask. People are only seeking confirmation, comfort, recognition or power. Therefore, the masterpiece does not get completed in this life. I see people as canvas and possibility. I see everything as that. It’s incredible how people cannot be honest with where they actually are and fantasize their accomplishment to be so much greater. I personally would rather err on the side of humility and be open to the idea that I may be less than I imagine due to ignorance and fear- this masking that leads to self deception. Here are some quotes from others…


“Self deception has many faces. Mostly people imagine themselves to be further along than they are and fail to take the necessary important steps to true transformation. People do what feels comfortable, and imagine they have faced their fears. “

“Of all the liars in the world, sometimes the worst are our own fears.”

Rudyard Kipling

“Nothing is so difficult as not deceiving yourself.”—Ludwig Wittgenstein

(Self-deception involves incongruity between beliefs, actions, and the world.)

“Lying to ourselves is more deeply ingrained than lying to others.”


“You can fool yourself, you know. You’d think it’s impossible, but it turns out it’s the easiest thing of all.”

“The lies we tell other people are nothing to the lies we tell ourselves.”

“People who believe that they are strong-willed and the masters of their destiny can only continue to believe this by becoming specialists in self-deception.”

“Stop lying to yourself. When we deny our own truth we deny our own potential.”

“Deception, flattering, lying, deluding, talking behind the back, putting up a false front, living in borrowed splendor, wearing a mask, hiding behind convention, playing a role for others and for oneself — in short, a continuous fluttering around the solitary flame of vanity — is so much the rule and the law among humans that there is almost nothing which is less comprehensible than how an honest and pure drive for truth could have arisen among them.”

Self-deception is often easy to recognize in others but far more difficult to recognize in ourselves. With another, we may have a better perspective that is not colored by an investment in seeing that person or his circumstances in a certain light. With ourselves, we both lack perspective and have an investment in seeing and understanding ourselves and our circumstances in certain ways. The lack of perspective combined with needing and wanting to see ourselves and our circumstances in certain ways is why self-deception is so potentially dangerous and debilitating if it runs too deeply or in too many directions.

Self-deception has many guises, which also contributes to its being difficult to identify. There are the more familiar forms of denial, rationalization, and minimization.  But what exactly is self-deception?

A preliminary definition:  Self-deception is a set of practices and attitudes that hinders a person from making a reliable assessment of her situation. As a consequence, she is unable to appropriately recognize her own agency and often fails to grasp what is or isn’t her rightful responsibility.

Self-deception may be intentional. It may be unintentional.  The line between the two is blurry; one form can often change into another. The more frequent direction is from intentional to unintentional. In certain situations, engaging in intentional self-deception may be necessary and life-saving.

Two very different cases involving different types of self-deception illuminate these features. The first case involves denial.

Consider a person who is experiencing something traumatic such as domestic abuse. She may tell herself that it isn’t really happening or endows it with very different meaning.  She may know on some level that it is really happening but she denies it as a matter of survival or preservation of her well-being. She may become habituated to telling herself the same story about what has happened; it is her primary way of making sense of what she’s experiencing. The intention to preserve herself may recede deep into the background over time. Her self-deception moves from being intentional to unintentional. In this case, there is a clear investment in not seeing/accepting that she is being abused. As is often the case in abuse, the victim gets it wrong about what she can or cannot do; she can’t see where her agency ends and her abuser’s begins. She may believe that she can control enough in the environment so that her abuser will not get set off. And for some victimes, they may assume they are somehow responsible for what others are doing to them.

In this case, self-deception may be adaptive and helpful in some ways. At the exact same time, it may be dangerous and debilitating. This case of self-deception creates a double bind that is extraordinarily difficult to escape.

The second case involves procrastination, an especially tricky form of self-deception. Consider a person who knows that he has a substance use disorder (SUD). He can clearly describe his drinking patterns, increased tolerance, and feelings of withdrawal as well as chart the adverse effects caused by his drinking. He’s taken more online quizzes than he can count and has told his friends that he knows his drinking has progressed down the spectrum to full blown disorder. He knows he is an alcoholic and that he needs to do something about it. Today he makes himself the promise that he will get help tomorrow. Tomorrow he makes the same promise. This is procrastination.

Procrastination is a failure of the relationship between knowledge and the will, according to Soren Kierkegaard. Knowledge should guide our actions but when we know what we should do but are unwilling even for a moment, a gap opens. A quick as a wink moment of hesitation can grow into a long series of moments of nonaction.

Procrastination is deceptive because it masquerades as activity. The man who promises to get help can tell himself that he is gathering more information, getting his affairs into order, making arrangements, etc. He can keep turning all the considerations he can possibly identify over in his mind. Repeatedly. He can begin to manufacture other concerns that warrant consideration. He can tell all his family and friends everything he’s doing. At the end of each day, though, he still has not gotten help.

This person has an investment in seeing himself as the sort of person who does something about a problem. He may even see himself as the sort who grabs the bull by the horns. He is doing many things. In fact, he may be a whirling dervish gathering facts and “taking care of business.” But all this activity may make it very hard to accurately see his situation; he’s still not getting help. He isn’t exercising his agency effectively, which in turn means that he isn’t fully taking responsibility.

As Kierkegaard notes, procrastination is like sewing without tying a knot at the end of the thread. One makes the motions but one actually doesn’t sew. The practical consequences are quite different; the seat of your pants will still be split.”


You will and you must lose control. If you ever plan on being spiritually powerful, you will be first taken down lower than you ever thought possible. Because the light is too great. Because we have not yet imagined the possibility even when we think we have. It is a practice of expanding and stretching and weaving and mending. It is a work made of soft scars.

Sharada Devi

When The Sun Moves Northward: Mystery of the Crucifixion and Resurrection

an excerpt I just read

Crucifixion and Resurrection:

“With April comes the glorious idea of resurrection. The disciple leaves the dim and sad places in which he has been keeping vigil, and moves into the splendor… The Easter season is the ecstasy of the year, culminating in the great Feast of Resurrection, celebrated throughout Christendom on Easter Day. Then follows the purely spiritual and occult vigil of transmutation, after which the disciple, retaining firmly the place he has reached while the sun moved northward, repeats and recites the lessons he has learned, resolutely aiming at being born into a still higher state of spiritual life when again the birth month is reached.

The Easter season perpetually illustrates and commemorates that freedom which will be obtained by man at the end of his pilgrimage, when he has acquired all the knowledge to be obtained by human experience, and has cast off the last vesture or sheath of the spirit. When that freedom is obtained, the spirit will have finally left the Tomb – risen from the grave – and matter will know it no more.

At the commencement of this great Feast of Resurrection, the Hall of Learning is full of life and activity. The Teachers await their disciples, looking with hope for those whom they have prepared, trusting they will have the courage to embark on this great enterprise.

This is no longer any warfare on that battle-field where the Arjuna of the Bhagavad Gita fights his lower nature and his evil passions. That battle has long since been fought and won by the disciple who is strong enough to enter upon the Easter feast, and take his place in the Hall of Learning.

This wonderful palace of wisdom was built, and is preserved in the ethereal space that is within reach of the spirits of men, by the initiates who are followers of the Christ, and remain near the world of men to teach and help them. All are bidden to come here, all are helped to enter; but only a few are able to do so. Those who can pass through the doors at this season feel the divine airs, and become aware of the Great Presences….

The whole object of the preparation and suffering lies in this miracle of transformation and transmutation. Here is the supreme mystery to be entered into by the disciple while he remains man. Destroy no thing, but make all things good, all things beautiful, all things desirable.

Remember that hate is the destroyer, love the creator and builder. Take death and make it life, as you take evil and make it good. The divine cannot be tarnished by evil any more than gold can suffer by contact with fire. Spirit can no more become matter than water can become one with fire. Gold is purified by burning, and the divine does but throw aside all that is not absolutely itself.

As it passes through the fiery ordeal, Spirit, when it identifies itself with matter, sweeps it away as water obliterates fire. It must long to become one with the fire, before the miracle can be accomplished. The spiritual part of the man must so recognize the darkness and death of the physical, must so completely and willingly enter into it and transform it, the inevitable ill, into a thing desirable, that it shall dissolve away, and vanish in its character and quality as that which is ill or evil.

So, in entering the Tomb, the Christ of the world, the Buddha of the world, the Krishna of the world, destroys the Tomb itself. His supreme spirituality is stronger than that which would hold or bind him, and his supreme Love changes its nature into that which does not hold or bind.

It is useless to attempt to understand the true meaning of resurrection until the previous ceremonies have not only been entered into, and fully understood, but their ordeals endured. In this manner, the story of the year follows the story of the life of the ego, the “one who walks.” Until the winter is experienced and endured, the green leaves do not come. Until the lessons of human life have been learned, that which lies beyond it is unapproachable….

Those who have passed through the Easter Ceremony once can never hurt or kill or give pain anymore; and with each season that they pass through it, do they penetrate more and more fully into its glorious depths; they grow in strength, and become vital and irresistible forces in the world….

In the deep place of the animal soul is darkness; it is conscious only of material things, of passions and desires. There is no knowledge in it, even of the phenomena of earth life, save by the help of the senses….

But it is in this deep place of the soul that the spirit sits shrouded, and it is here that is the quick spring of love and life eternal. Here, within every man, is the Tomb, the place of darkness where the miracle takes place, from which the spirit rises, in which the spring of life and love bursts forth. Taste of this spring, bathe in it, asking no questions, but simply drinking of it, and the hunger for knowledge and longing for light will pass away. These desires of the spirit, which fill it with restless craving, will pass away, because illumination will have been attained.

The water of life will so gush forth that you must give of it to others, and in so doing, an unutterable joy will arise within you. You have now all that you need and more; enough for others; enough for the whole world. You have achieved the miracle of the resurrection, you have made the greenness spring forth within yourself; and in so doing, you are making the earth green about you, and bringing the joy of new life upon the world.

In the school of love there is a pledge to be taken at the very door, before you can enter. This pledge, already taken in the ordeal of the Feast of Love, must be said in the heart of the disciple at the Easter Feast.

“I will Love.”

You no longer desire love, or ask love, or look for love. You give it.”


“The ancient symbol of the cross shows the joining of Spirit and Matter through overcoming the limitations of each. That’s what we celebrate this time each year. Love is greater than separateness. Love is greater than fear. Love is greater than death.”

Sharada Devi

Get Back Up

The alchemy of tantric transmutation is transforming emotional lead into energetic gold. We must weigh the balance of our lives between bondage and error versus grace and power. We are all addicted to movement.  That’s what karma is. Shakti facilitates indiscriminately. Bodhichitta determines the results of our actions. Who is doing this and why are you doing this? By physically withdrawing from samsara as much and as often as possible you are able to begin the process of spiritual withdrawal from materialistic/social insanity. And by understanding the necessity of this mental and emotional detoxification, you are able to endure the fires of purification whose flames reach deep physical places where the past has been stored- and you are able to hopefully greet the hardships of this temporary discomfort as a genuine blessing although disguised for a time as something that is working against what you may think you want.  The pain of this passage is that of withdrawal.  You get the darkness blessed out of you. Not all at once and not once and for all. This happens incrementally at any level of meditation.  But unlike any level of meditation, the discipline of a daily prolonged structure or a focused group or private retreat forces an inescapable entry, and eventual relationship, to the involuntary movements of passion, gradually transforming it into the voluntary movement of compassion.  The generator that drives the realm of desire is entered and transformed. By re-establishing the true purpose of your life -you are withdrawing from the narcotic of distraction, of movement, and are forced to relate to reality without samsaric buffer. It is the threshold that is being guarded by a great wisdom. Only those who really mean what they pray for will be allowed to cross the line that breaks all the rules. The rules must be broken astrally for grace to descend. Grace must be ridden. We fall from the horse but the white horse is always there…you should always get back up.

Sharada Devi

reply to Marty applies to all.

  • So thought I’d post this- maybe it will reach someone or make someone realize these days we waste in our ruts and imaginings of our spiritual prowess are no joke.  Death is what we make of it now. How we can enter and face the ancient demons of our own making in the darkest of rooms.


The conditions of our death are mostly karmically determined. We like to think we can know or plan how that will be.

But lots can happen. Purification of the unconscious is done to help the light shine brighter at the end.

Imagining will not make it so. The path to a death that is meaningful and pure is about the way you face changes now.

For example, you said you weren’t ready to “go under my blade” (something like that) as if I have one and if so I have the power to use it on you. That not readiness- is what you’ll witness at the end. Better to go under death’s blade while still living instead of waiting until death. But one must know that from within and want it with all their heart- because this fear is what separates us from “God.”

But of course I can’t tell you these things. You must know them already. That’s where lifetimes come together like threads finally weaving.

Not to say it’s not going to create a huge mess. This is the plan. You cannot control anything. When push comes to shove it’s not such a pretty picture of om mani padme hum and Buddha’s on a cold winter day…it’s all hell breaking loose when the gate opens. So what you clean up and clear up now with courage and maturity depends on your alliances. Both on this earth and beyond. A couple trips to mount Shasta will not be enough- you think you were “opened” by that enough to make a trip back there again to reminisce? What’s the point? It’s all right in front of you but you avoid it- there’s a long road ahead. You need to know that. Plus time is running out.

“It’s best to die before you die so that when you die you don’t have to die.” That’s what the yogis say.

Everyone will need to know they require a teacher/guide sooner or later. (not a dead one either/ as that gets very delusional) And good luck not being misled by appearances, groupies and nice building.

I know you mean well- and think as much as you you feel.

A spiritual name is a goal not a declaration. It’s an aspiration not a claim. We must have the wisdom to see how little we know and realize. Not by words but by actions.

It’s hard. For everyone. That’s why we are still here. Pretending. It’s very terrifying to become real.

Love Sharada Devi

I have not learned anything else.

No one understood the flower sermon,

except the one who smiled. The flower sermon communicated the ineffable nature of such-ness-
which is the transmission of wisdom without words.
There is the form of the formless, the subtle eternal truth that does not rest on words or letters but is a special transmission of presence.
This cannot be found in any book, mantra or prayer. This is why the one who knows does not speak and the one who speaks does not know.
Then what can anyone do but point at the moon and be misunderstood?
Hold up a flower and wait.
I have not learned anything else.
Sharada Devi

to add to my last post….

I have received many emails and messenger messages. Please know that I made the video as a form of magic for the light (we all call the Guru -who is wise) within Bhagavan Das to awaken so he will start making some better choices before it’s too late. (if it isn’t already -I was told he will take many months if not longer to recover if it’s even possible)

I WAS NOT devotionally WORSHIPPING Bhagavan Das as my Guru. He has a lot to learn. He would not listen to me. He is with a woman who only makes the problem he has worse, not better. He is surrounded by shark, opportunist groupies. It is dark and dangerous territory as we are seeing.

Please pray that he awakens and remembers who his real friends are. It’s all anyone can do now. His true friends aren’t trying to get on stage with him for starters.

His friends would stop using him, but then again- he needs to stop using them…

Do you see what I’m saying?
The loop he has insisted on running is proving to be deadly.

The party is over. His greatest fear was to become Ram Das and be devoured by groupies at the end of his life.

I tried to save him from that. But it was a curse bigger than me obviously.

I want him to do something miraculous and

Love, Sharada Devi