kiss me where I’m hurt


I need to know if I should write the white law upon paper unstained by human hands.

I need to know how much I’m worth.

I need to know why we pay for love.

I need to know how to make more money.

Beyond the law and besides myself there is nothing but a stretch of long white pages.

I could be the one. I could be priceless.
I could love myself less and less. But for you who reads every letter of every word, even misspelled. Even unkind. But for you who empties your pages on me. I would be speechless. Unable to see the white light. Spread before me, the poetry. The stories of sadness. Long gray journeys of the two who must become one. Sunlight on my body of burden. Nothing but sleepless dreams of your voice. How I want to say everything, how I have nothing left to say. The sound of breathing makes me nervous. The sound of hearts make me afraid. Love after love I have emptied you into something besides this poem. I speak of laws and final things as an act of purpose, who would lead the way. Because I am lost, all alone on this endless page of what could be. I tempt, I seduce and I wait. I play whoever I must to capture your heart by my own. Out of fear of deep sorrow, I do not know. I don’t want to know how this ends. I don’t want to see where you’ll go. When I’m gone who will erase me as beautifully as you? White silken, hypnotic enchantment. The sounds of God being called are all around you. I am simply attempting to summon the muse, tip the chalice. Ink on paper. “Defile me the pure vessel who could be anything.” I say this secretly inside every word. But I must, pretend I am chaste to the letter of the word. To the law I pretend to obey. Only for you. As this game. Why we cry because we mourn what we cannot see. Who we find between us, this page. The vessel of perfection where stories of victorious gods are written. Where true undying love reigns supreme. Over me the sky falls and I listen for you in the light however obscured. I listen for your breath mingled with mine and then I write about how I might own you. One day. “Sanctify me in the blood of white sound.” I write. But really I whisper with no words at all,

“kiss me where I’m hurt.”

Sharada Devi


9 thoughts on “kiss me where I’m hurt”

  1. It’s beautiful white
    Summer day leading
    Into the place we wait.
    I wrote this, just before I read this:
    She’s in love with the dark,
    The light of forever.
    Dawns like a bird
    Because it flies high above the world
    Caving in. A place to start. Listen to the eagle’s cry. With sober eyes, wet with time.

    I told her “help me” because I am a candle afraid that I will go out, and I want to bathe her in white, because she is the form, the purpose of me.

    1. where and why do we wait?
      caving in…a place to start?

      but if I’m in love with the dark,
      wouldn’t you want to let the flame die?

      the light of the cave is mysterious
      and I think we wait for sparks…
      the beginning of her eyes.
      I wait for this.

      only until you burn
      through the fear of death
      firebird, will you know…
      there is no dark.

  2. I need, I could, I am lost.
    So. Pretend.
    Play the game. Without needing to know.
    How… is Your purpose, which speaks of endings.
    Could…leaves us with possibilities lost
    in Creation.
    What else is there?
    No One can erase True Beauty…

  3. (you help us be the stars that we are, and my guess is that we help you be the guiding star) (so much love to you dear one)…..
    Om Mani Padme Hum

  4. Love itght
    star light
    what have i got to lose
    it is either
    or it ain’t
    i can count the beads away
    but where does that take me
    i do it in my head
    my empty
    use- less head
    holds the striated records
    it’s not my fault
    i did not choose to re a record holder
    here i am.

  5. There is no “in between” we cannot know. “Glimpse” into this “oneness” and then it dis-appears. Into ether. Rest in the not knowing. Hold the blue pearl of Om Mani Padme Hum where all darkness and light mingle into ONE universal DNA anchored by the gravity of love.

  6. let paper go
    let law lay
    it’s all just musty chatter
    keep still
    wait it out
    it’s just any easy wind blowing by…
    all things resolve
    all things must pass
    nothing is really now
    it’s all illusion.
    until breaking the rules
    turns idiots into utter fools.
    then keep breaking the rules.
    You know your worth
    You are the one
    You are priceless
    we all are.
    ready to rise and glimpse
    with extreme clarity
    the inner sanctum of
    unchartered skies
    where there are no lies
    to chastise
    i love Cala Lillies
    so pristine
    such purity of essence
    lacking pretense
    and yet so wordlessly exquisite
    simply blooming silent and soft
    making all that surrounds
    a little more lofty

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