Kali gives⚡️️

♦The Guru is the solid ground we walk upon. No, it’s not modern and cool advice on how all the great saints and siddhas were actually incorrect and you can, in fact, just be your own do-it-yourself- instant, self made, all knowing Guru- and so you’re not too serious and you don’t really want to hear it all over again- because mostly you read this blog for entertainment as just another free of charge way to amuse yourself over the internet. Several hundred people read this blog daily and mostly just remain very quiet with only a few making their presence known, but thanks to the hit counter plus a lot of personal emails, I know you all exist and I thank you so much for your time- and I also wonder what you’re looking for?

Ironically enough, I know at least a handful of people reading who do not like me at all- and only read the blog to further agitate their projection of negativity onto me and stoke their obvious disowned jealousy- it gets really old, and so on a certain level, I don’t get it, I don’t know what you want- I know I have stalkers and that’s really disturbing and creepy, and I also know I have people who are porous, receptive and with the purist intention. My intention is to carve greatness from the mediocrity of mere stone- like any inspired artist- to chip away at the God I see in the rock. I know it’s not my place to intrude, but that’s my only intention in writing this blog, to make you, because that means making me, into the divine being that we are- and I know all this talk of “me and my opinions” might feel redundant- maybe you are getting tired of the rant- but tell me what else should I do? Posture, be super kind and strenuously humble so that you won’t think dirty nasty little thoughts about me when you read the word fuck? Well, it’s all for effect and it’s all for good cause- as far as I can know from within myself- and so people- both women and men get pissed- they cannot stand me- and I know these people…

and the women can’t stand me because they can’t be me- and the men can’t stand me because they can’t fuck me- and even if they were given the chance- sadly, they wouldn’t know how anyway- and if you’re reading this- or secretly watching the YouTube channel because you don’t even love Bhagavan das enough to join and give “your father Guru” (you said it not me) $13.00 a month- what’s that say about your “devotion to your Guru?” Oh, that’s right…

ME….me, the gold digging, egomaniac, opportunist, wicked, dark whore playing Goddess and Guru trainer- pushed all you limp dick liars away from tantric daddy’s sweet blood? Oh yes, I agree it was me who ended the perverse fantasy that you had any devotion at all- because, oh, that’s right, your idea of devotion is a sleazy romance novel- or an all you can eat party at Neem Karoli Baba’s house- and devotion to you is what you do when you want to push all your projections onto “the wild and crazy old sadhu who gets all the girls?”

Well, you were all a bunch of tangled, stupid, party hopping snakes and Bhagavan Das was the happy snake hole- and you put yourself under his charm and you could have done something real with his greatness like I did- because you see, I KNOW what a Guru is and YOU DON’T. A Guru isn’t a person- but the person is the vessel of the Guru- and that vessel has an obligation to the Holy Ghost that fills it- and I came and slaughtered you all – not because Bhagavan Das was your victim but because the Holy Ghost he carries cannot be defiled, disrespected or tainted by the cheapening of the message and holy life of the chosen vessel- who for you, happened to be Bhagavan Das.

You had your chance to reform yourself- and so instead of uselessly fighting the “righteous impenetrable wall of Dharma” who came as ME (for those who don’t know my name was Dharma when I met Bhagavan Das) if you had actually loved him as you had claimed- nothing and nobody could have chased you away AND had your love been pure, yes, had you had any real devotion- I never would have pushed you away- and YES, I’ll be the judge and the tester of your pure love- because the position was dropped onto me by the holy powers that be- because I am a servant of the Dharma and I’ll die protecting it’s essence from the pollution of half ass fans and stalker groupies who only wanted a piece of Bhagavan Das’s ass and instead he gave his WHOLE ASS to ME- he gave his whole ass to the Motherlight of Dharma- and you just can’t get over it…

well, look at you now? You think you’ve got something figured out after all is said and done and now you arrogantly pity me and my huge ego trip? Then, if I’m the one with the problem, why are you so obsessed with me? Why do you love to hate me so much? Why are you so addicted to your version of me?

Stop lying, you know it’s true, I can hear you thinking…you’re all over in my face and it’s not only totally sad, it’s just plain weird- you’re dreaming about me at night- with my eyes stuck in your dreary, little angry head and you’re still in denial and you’re still wondering why Bhagavan Das chose me over “you?” Well, I guess he chose me because he’s just like you, a great devotee of She Who Is The Darkness That Slays Liars. But unlike you, his devotion is pure and not at all looking for a worldly hook…

and since I’m not a liar- meaning afraid to be a person in my own right- and you wish you weren’t a liar and you weren’t so self censoring and afraid to speak your truth- and so since you’re still too afraid to basically be “you” in all you dualistic splendor, whoever that is, you pick me to hate because you can’t be who I am- which is everything you aren’t- meaning unafraid of what lies beneath the surface and unafraid of the tumult of my splendor…

and it’s not physical- even though you can’t stop staring at me- you just can’t believe in yourself as the owner of Dharma enough to stand up for anything- I mean ANYTHING- and so you spend years congregating in some sort of mutiny behind my back- as if there was such a thing as me not seeing behind my back because I DO- and so it’s to no avail- because look at you now- you were so much more beautiful lost inside of his mystical love- look at you now with that bag of chips watching Netflix and feeling all smug because you’re so smart not to believe in that Guru thing anymore?

Your claims of undying love and your crocodile tears for God were the farce- I simply clarified by testing the waters for the sake of the Dharma- and all that I found that was “real” was your sexual frigidity and your disowned father complex- all of which you pushed onto your Guru and yet never did a thing with intending to purify any of it, no matter what your Guru said…

and since you couldnt get any girls to fuck you in highschool because they thought you were so gross- you try to live through Bhagavan Das’s sex life you pervert? Then you call it the “left hand path” and what makes him your Guru is gauged by his sexual promiscuity- and so I, the “dark wicked one” come along and actually bring forth Bhagavan Das’s true siddhis and powers inherent in the lineage by giving him some space from energy zapping fleas such as yourself and you say I took him off the path and so you attack and slander your Guru’s wise wife?

Bhagavan Das was too lenient and wasn’t paying attention to you like I do- and he was spinning you all with no ground beneath any of you including himself- and so I BECAME THE GROUND HE WALKS ON- because he needed me and I have been his spiritual friend since the beginning of time and nothing and no one will tear his love and devotion away from me like I tore it away from you- because you’re all fakes that’s all…but I know in time, in a few thousand years or so you might work these kinks out because the eternal seed of devotion is in you…

but isn’t it interesting how it all plays out and still you will not see who, what or where the Guru is? But of course, go ahead and keep playing your mundane mommy the nurse, savior games with other sick dying people and keep on making those horrible, out of tune kirtan cds in which you attempt to mimic Bhagavan Das, it’s embarrassing, but go on ahead…it’s your loss- I’m not wicked, I’m a star.

You don’t know me, you never did, I never said one unkind word to any of you, I merely stopped the charade in its tracks because Bhagavan Das was a rarified flower you were stomping on- and yes he’s responsible for his wildly unconventional and misinterpreted behavior and he knows it ….and he, as a great being who is more humble than anyone I have ever known, had the wisdom to hear the Dharma speak from inside his own wise heart- and he took her solid hand of devotion- and the rest is history- and too bad you disowned him is all I can say for you- because before I found Bhagavan Das I searched far and wide- and I KNOW what I know- and I DO know- and NOBODY carries in their vessel what he carries and especially not in America- and NOBODY has the siddhi of perfection of sound that he does because of his bhakti he is a magical siddha- and because no one else had a love as pure as Bhagavan Das did for his Guru- Neem Karoli Baba granted to him alone the vac siddhi- or the perfection of nada brahma- the sound current…pretty special I’d say…

and all these Jewish business men – out there doing kirtans and trying to be Gurus- so famous and rich- so green with envy it hurts- all these slimy, posturing “holier then thou” men who rode on Bhagavan Das’s back to get there- many of who were even given their spiritual names by Bhagavan Das- AND who only ever even met Neem Karoli Baba BECAUSE of Bhagavan Das – turn him into the black sheep, negate him, gossip about him- try to use him any chance they get- so jealous you just don’t have the magic…sorry about that, but once a fake, always a fake- and shiny rayon glamour or a good marketing strategy can’t ever change that…

well, you’re all hellbound on the name of RAM as far as I’m concerned…

and so because the purity within Bhagavan Das’s heart compelled him to choose the light of Dharma- (yes I mean me) over you- we have nothing in this material world- because your big Jewish bank accounts don’t pay for unmarketable product right? And as if Bhagavan Das wasn’t already questionable enough to market- I had to come along as the big taboo me- and destroy any market value possible- it’s all such a financial shame and plus the sex drug party’s over…

you can’t use this Guru simply as a drug to get high anymore- and so I don’t care if we’re monetarily poor and have nothing but four well meaning dogs- because at least we still have our souls intact and our conscious is rich with clarity. Yes, I see we have no real value in this world because this world values shit in the form of cotton candy “spiritual” people such as yourselves- and this world fears the true Mother Light- such as the cleansing power of the threatening Vajra Dharma that we emulate and embody- no one can touch us – I didn’t say we were better than anyone, we’re just not sellouts trying to copy someone else and we also are not posturing or pretending to be some instagram updated version of “spiritual” we just are who we are- and you just can’t touch us because the Dharma is impenetrable and bigger than any person…

even then, it’s a harsh world we’ve been dropped into- but we still do not have to sell our souls to the Jewish men who run the yoga and bhakti VIP scene- and I’m just so weary of the pitiful pageant of clowns dancing and singing around pictures of Gurus, happy to remain as blind lepers clinging to their rotting skin- it’s confusing to me, that’s all…

it’s not about you, me, Bhagavan Das or even the rainbow body of Neem Karoli Baba- it’s about the Holy Ghost filling us all with our own pure essence of bhakti- and we do need a Guru and you were probably very wrong to betray the only genuine Guru you will likely ever have in this life and then blame it on me- or you’ve even blamed it on him for “choosing a wife as wicked as me.”

Well, honestly- and I know you’re reading this because you faithfully read my blog every day- I’m very disappointed in you because I saw your striving spark of love and there was a seed of truth in you back then- and you let it slip away because I made you turn inside your skin just by existing – you know, jealousy should not have been your new God -and your new career in “being so mundane you are in fact, super spiritual” – cannot replace your Guru’s grace no matter how “zen” and open you try to be…

I feel so sad for you. I pray for you and I send you light not because I have more but because it seems your eyes are closed and it’s time to wake up now. Near death experiences should bring us deeper into love not denial of that love as if it were never valid or substantial…you obviously were the one you were loving through your Guru’s eyes and hating yourself as if you were a fake is only a defense mechanism disguised as a deeper understanding of that love’s origin when really it was only that you heard death knocking and didn’t know the safest door to answer…in the bardo that mistake is easily made, even though we’re already dead. Wake up now before it’s too late, in the essence of your own fearless love and don’t let me be the fire breathing dragon that stops you…

and so sorry to ramble but it needed to be said and my dear friends and readers maybe you don’t want to hear it- any of it- or believe it- any of it- or maybe you consider its validity based on a more lukewarm interpretation on what a Guru is- but maybe that’s because of your limited experiences of mediocre posturing Gurus and so you’ve never met the real thing and so you have no idea how to enter this conversation or process my words. You can only think about what it might mean in theory, you can only intend to understand me- but until you experience the power of your own lion heart in the embodiment of the other as infinity you will not ever be able to grasp its implications for yourself…

I wonder what came first the chicken or the egg? That’s the problem with devotion, where does it come from and what really even is it? Is it some cult worship of another pretty face playing God looking for followers who will support, uphold and pay for their self aggrandizement? Is it just some big kids posing as evolving adults playing house and this time I can play Jesus and so you can do what I say or God won’t give you the time of day?

I think no. None of the above. The Guru is as near and as necessary as my breath is to stay alive and as supremely important as the life giving sun should we too shine the light of God.

And this isn’t about me and my inflated tangents, tibetan buddhist affiliations- or me just being an obnoxious hypocrite- you cannot judge actions that are above your head- Yes, I said it. My actions are so far above your head you don’t even SEE ME. As a matter of fact, I don’t even SEE ME. That’s the price I pay for my devotion to the Guru, I am alone, with or without the God in you…

Bhagavan Das is a genuine tantric Guru, he has so many mystical powers it isn’t even funny- and his power to open your heart is his biggest power of all- and so I will stand behind him as a cobra waiting to strike- because he is the absolute carrier of the diamond, the diamond that I guard with my very own life- and I would not have died for him so many times were it not true from the depths of my ancient heart…

Bhagavan Das cannot kill me, he cannot chase me away, he cannot turn my eyes to this world looking for a more convenient or obliging love. No he cannot- because he doesn’t have the power to do so, he is only a man and my devotion has made him God and because of this I become God through him, because of him and also in spite of him- because that’s the dance, the game of greatness- and that’s tantra playing in the wind. So you really missed the point didn’t you? It’s not about a man or the woman- it’s about the magnificence of what we can turn each other into by the power of our love. Bhakti is devotion, it is invincible and cuts like a knife.

Don’t kill me, please do. I will die for you. I will disappear into you. The party is over we’re all alone. The music has stopped playing and now all I hear is the love in your breath and all I see is the light in your eyes. Take me with you Gurudev, wherever you go. Take me to hell, take me to heaven, rip open my body and crawl deep inside. Make me yours, I am forever the shell of God…

you need a Guru if you want to know life so that you can face death and go high. The Guru is an earth shattering cosmic force of nature awakened only by your pure, unwavering devotion. The Guru really is everywhere as how we learn through all things eventually- but you will definitely need to pull one to earth just for you into someone’s pure body- into someone that moves your soul and reminds you of what you imagine God might feel like, otherwise you will never feel what love is and you will never know your mother, Motherlight…

like Bhagavan Das always says,
“the feel is for real”

and I am always in service to that because my heart has eyes and they saw him and I knew,
“Guru, is that you?”

“I love you” he said…

and I knew he was my mother without a doubt. God bless me. Kali gives⚡️️
♦Sharada Devi

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4 thoughts on “Kali gives⚡️️”

  1. “The GURU is the source of inspiration and enables one to experience the nature of ones own mind.” Jamgon Kongtrul the 3rd

    We are all on the journey back to our own pure heart drop, from the great space of suchness. We become in this life who we really are. The final test is meeting Dharmaraja who is King Death. When my Guru Neem Karoli Baba inniated me at the Kumbha Mela in Allhabad India in 1966, he said to me “I am your father” he then gave me the mantra for the sun and a sacred thread that only fathers in India give to there sons when they are 13 years of age. (It’s slow growing up in southern Kali-fornia) I wasn’t 13 but 19 at the time. I was in a group of about 10 million God intoxicated Indians who had come to this holy site which is located at the merging of the two great rivers the Ganga and the Yummuna. So when Venus and Jupiter got together in the morning sky on the day of my initiation we all headed down to the river to take our bath. It was about 4 in the morning and as I looked out the entire expanse of the divine river was filled with the devotion of flower offerings and a it had become a shade of white that looked like fresh milk. The bhakti of the people and their faith in the promise of shiva had turned the Holy Ganga into pure SOMA, the nectar of immortality. When I left the river I bought a red rose and went to the tent of Anandamayi Ma (the greatest and most famous saint in India who was considered an Avatar of GOD) I stopped in the distance just before moving closer to the entrance of her tent temple and saw that the tent had about about 10,000 people in it chanting. I stood still, totally enchanted and holding the red rose to my heart thinking how could I ever give it to her? And then immediately after that thought, I saw in the far distance a silvery white light floating towards me. The Divine Mother was on her way to bless her child. Anandamayi Ma was the floating light who moved towards me and now she stood in front of me smiling and holding out her hand so that I could give her the rose. Then I knelt down and put my head on her lotus feet and my heart opened into the earth and I merged in the MOTHER LIGHT. When I got up she looked into my eyes and then slowly turned around and seemed to disappear back into the tent. So I was so happy to have my Guru and the form of Mother God to worship for my initiation and awakening into the realm of Shiva back then in 1966 because it became the foundation for my being. And 40 years later another form of Mother God who is The Queen of the Dakinis, The Great Bliss Mother Light herself in the name and form of Sharada Devi aka Kalidharma came to find me in the darkness of America where I got lost once I left the purity of India and the solitude of the Himalayas.
    So even when I lost my way in the jungle of the material world in of America the Mother Light found me again and brought me home to her heart so that I could remember mine.

    So make your prayers and aspirations now before you enter the terrible bardo between birth and death because everything counts.
    Good life, Good death.

    She is the wisdom sky dancing naked dakini who holds all the secrets of the Vajra (thunderbolt ) Guru. In fact she is his Siddhi and only by Her grace did he became a Siddha, to save all sentient beings from drowning in the ocean of birth and death.

    All Glory to Sri Guru Dev!
    Shantiprakash Bhagavan das Dharmasara

  2. I love you and Bhagavan Das. I appreciate all the precious, priceless, humongous gifts that you have given me. Kali gives.

  3. Oh Sharada Devi and Bhagavan Das, I can’t thank you enough as your words are a constant reminder of how my mind can run amok and can soil all that I do. A pen from work accidentally went home with me this week and there was Bhagavan Das at the forefront of my mind! Needless to say the pen came right back to work! Sending much aloha.

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