I wrote this for you


Like a diamond that is made from pain, I think you are perfect. This is the bottom line- which I know is all that you want. It’s a window tonight I opened for you, starlight. You know what this means. It means I am ready for tomorrow to be tonight. I of course, would go anywhere for you, fall from the sky just to touch you. Explode into me, you- the coming of God eternal. Never to leave you, crucified because I want to know you. I would become ash for the earth to eat. I would never leave your eyes as long as they watched me, I would cry from the clouds to be inside what you ache. I would delete myself for you- the way the last second of night disappears into midnight’s annihilation. That is my intention. Take me, holy and pure. Defiled pagan devil. Burning from underneath. No one sees where I live. Understand I am nothing. I offer all I am into the heartache that fills me. Smoke, this means if you read my scars you’ll know. Into the words of black prose that smother me in dark flames, I am telling you my quiet secret. I have nothing left to say, float inside me. Listen, I give my words to your voiceless mouth. Sky without eyes I feel you everywhere moving heaven and below where I fear…and you take me. Down, sex black hell, my forgiveness. Yes you knew where she hid the light. I need something bigger. Move my hand. Lighter and darker than me. There is me touched by you. Less hurt, more pain. See, see. See. I feel More, more. More…less of my thoughts to want or to be. You, only you. There is no sky for me. Only this that reaches deep. Yes, I vow forever. Worse and worse, only better, do I suffer for your love. You’re mine. Yes I know there is no me- to be me- without you to see- me- give me yourself like starfire dies. You once told me how…how I yearn for the distant between us only to pull at the throb like a creature of death. I want more. More of you, so I can be the loss that you bleed. Heaven hold me. All over me. Hell take me. Find me in here between bodies dying into you. We made God. Blood in this body of sadness. I don’t have another God but the one that we make. This pain that love makes, kills and creates once again. As I turn into the cover of night you are with me, smoldering within. We can be more than a crescent at dawn. We can be all that is. Flames never die when we want them
as the fire itself. I do the death of dying, don’t you want me. Full moon you mean so much more than your shadow…as if you weren’t the goddess slithering upon my saintly bed. I am gone in your eloquent body when you know. Star shine serpent, she should be this queen. I can’t live without you. Not tomorrow, not ever again. My light, give me life. Like a diamond that is made from pain, Β I said this to you. Give yourself to me. It is here that we shine brighter as one. Here in the wrath of our maddening lust. God gave me wings so I would use them, on you. They say diamonds are forever. Β I wrote this for you. Sharada Devi

13 thoughts on “I wrote this for you”

  1. Awake, yet to sleep, i looked up into the dawn of today
    There, still hanging high was the glowing golden crescent
    Glint of sun on the rise playing off the transitioning sky
    Blazing yellow crescent, rivaling the solar ray
    Luna giving way while yet holding fast to the last of night’s light
    Luminous bodies in opposition
    – caught in the cross fire where forever diamonds are formed.
    I thought of you… in the phase the moon had taken
    With it’s bold quality of color initiating the day
    How the full moon had spilled away with such a quickness
    You say there is more to be than a crescent at dawn.
    I believe You.

    1. I’m glad someone believes me. Axis of the moon. Tilted, dizzy with words. Tell me why I’m always alone…one more time. Don’t get me wrong. The crowds are huge. Her face is enormous. I’m not doing this on purpose. Love couldn’t be weak if it tried. What is love, that’s the riddle that fits inside the question I just asked. Radhe Shyam.

      1. This one is a lone dark liquid blue puddle in the middle of the mystery that solves the riddle…
        i am the abstract equation that quivers then melts at the mere sight of the words –
        Radhe Shyam

        1. Pretty. the end is volatile yet bright.
          Then it’s all covered by the darkness
          of love…where is that light?

          1. the end is never the end.
            dazzling distant star dust
            out of the blue
            striking right into the bright white
            light filtering down from eons past
            flaming matrix ceasing to exist mid-flight
            extinct upon arrival
            shatter impact
            crystallized refraction of twisted illusion
            precise and punctual for our earthly survival
            Light is what we desire and so it shall be hither
            even though we are both just a memory when it collides and delivers
            A blink of the eye of Vishnu
            a moment in the dream scheme of Brahma
            But the existence of Radhe Shyam is eternal…
            πŸ’ πŸ’ πŸ’ πŸ’ πŸ’ πŸ’ πŸ’ πŸ’ πŸ’ πŸ’ πŸ’ πŸ’ 
            Diamonds are not only forever
            they are the hardest substance on earth
            the dichotomy of that difference and being soft is utterly delicious…
            πŸ’™ πŸ•‰ πŸ’™

  2. Dead flowers
    I was thinking this morning how to live somewhere. And I couldnt do it. Nothing makes sense without this answer- My only mission is to launch from pain with you…make space…for the heart flower to grow, this is all I know…the rest is a blur and confusion is crushing…me, slowly. I don’t want his to be just words. I want to be real. Like the smell of death. Shocking, I want to be awake for the earth quake.

  3. I know nothing yet only know this endless
    longing for you and in the wake the message
    was you know the true ways of all
    hearts the longing and sadness that forever
    lingers in the hollow bones forever
    searching for light. Living in the cruel endless suffering where heaven and earth embrace in your eyes, your endless love
    never fading and besodden by
    the grace of it all.

  4. Don’t want to be afraid anymore
    Want to walk into the cave
    I want to turn in, not away
    from the sound, until my bones are seen.


    1. Ok….♦️β™₯️♦️β™₯️♦️β™₯️♦️β™₯️♦️β™₯️♦️β™₯️♦️β™₯️♦️β™₯οΈβ™¦οΈπŸ””πŸ””πŸ””πŸ””πŸ””πŸ””πŸ””πŸ””πŸ””πŸ””πŸ””πŸ””πŸ””πŸ””πŸ””πŸ””πŸ””πŸ””πŸ””πŸ””

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