I was walking outside on the terrace this evening as the sun was setting. It is a beautiful hospital in Portland Oregon where I’m staying. The view of the city is captivating and the tram goes up and down the side of the mountain. I was walking as I do for many hours every day and toward the end of my walking this white barked tree called me towards her. She was a thin tree. Young and not that tall, but vibrant and kind nonetheless. So I walked over to her and stood there and waited to see what she wanted. Of course I need her more than she needs me. And I faced her silently and then I put my arms around her and rested my head on her trunk where two branches were meeting and I stood there telepathically connecting to her for several minutes. Trees don’t chit chat. They speak direct and solid. She loved me and gave me roots. She spiraled energy freely and generously up and down my body.
She brought me peace and calm. She told me we weren’t separate and that she was my mother.
I didn’t imagine this. It happened. She healed me and loved me and nobody even knows she’s there.
We just walk on by. She has so much to share and give and we just walk on by. Using her only if we need something like shade or firewood. What a waste of what this life could be. The magic of life is so all encompassing it’s enrapturing.
In life we need to walk. We need to keep walking and we need to notice everything along the way.
We notice, we honor, we appreciate, we integrate and we never stop walking. That’s what this life is about- momentum and how much can you gather to get you up that hill. It’s a big hill we climb and its steep and it’s life.
If we’re successful we’ll do it right and wisely with whatever hand we’re dealt. We’ll take the blinders off. We’ll make the right choices. We’ll be brave and original. We won’t wait around for a leader. In this way, we’ll find what we need along the way. We are a part of this passing through. We aren’t separate. The scenery both good and bad passes through with us as long as we keep going. And when we don’t we get stuck in the swamps of the mind mesh and start sinking in that quicksand of our deluded mind.
Deluded that you’re here to suffer. No. Suffering is what happens when you’re confused. You’re here to move the energy and learn from the teacher who comes in many forms. You’re here to see clearly and the truth can be harsh. But why judge or need it to go your way? You’re just on a walk remember?
And so what if it’s hard or lonely or painful? Stop falling off to the side of the road. Stop thinking of yourself so much and start thinking of what you can create with your obstacles that will help others to keep moving forward too.
It’s all a motivator and a cold splash in the face.
The doctors eyes. The nurses hands. The bile in the tube. The lab results. This is it.
The sunset. The talking tree. The lonely path back through the hospital doors. It was made just for me. Realizations gathered from experience are neither right nor wrong. They’re a template from which to move forward.
I walk as close to the edge of what this all means as tightly and as clearly as I can. I’m not intending to make you feel safe or better and I’m not trying to give you hope.
I give you the fruits that grow from my heart.
Sometimes bitter and sometimes sweet.
Because God eats everything and it’s just